Every month is the same.  I find a worthy CHS athlete, challenge them to their sport, suffer a disheartening loss, and start the monotonous cycle over.  Often when athletes fall into a slump they will look for a quick fix to get them out.  The obvious option would be performance enhancing drugs. We watched Barry Bonds transform overnight from a skinny, scrawny outfielder to a home run monster with biceps as big as Queen Latifah’s thighs and an ego that was even bigger.  However as my friends at CVS pharmacy kindly reminded me, steroids are illegal and also have many negative effects.

For my latest challenge, I chose a more dangerous path as I looked to square up agains rock climbing protege Max McVety.Max is a semi-professional rock climber who competes in several of the American Bouldering Series tournaments. Max has made it to the regional rounds in years past and is hoping to make the national tournament this year.  Max trains primarily at Planet Rock on Jackson Road in Ann Arbor, which is one of the largest climbing gyms in the country.

So that’s where I found myself on a cold evening in November, preparing to literally risk my neck climbing up a giant wall with hand holds.  We would be competing in the bouldering section comprised of smaller walls with increased difficulty.  On the bouldering walls, harnesses are not needed as the farthest you can fall is eight feet.

This did not console me as my fear of heights kicks in at about five feet off the ground.
Max and I started with a quick warm-up climb before starting our competition.  We had decided that the best way to showcase Max’s talent was a race to the top of the wall.  I mounted my first hold, got a firm grip and pushed off, reaching skyward for the next one.  What I got instead was a handful of air as I fell backward onto the mat.  Above me I saw Max gracefully gliding from hold to hold as if gravity was a mere second thought to him.  He pulled himself up to the final hold, grinned triumphantly, and dropped off the wall.

After several more attempts my back was beginning to ache and I was spending most of my time on the ground.  Max won all four of the races as I had yet to complete the course without falling.  I had again been outmatched by my opponent to the point of embarrassment.  My record has sunk to 0-3 and my spirits have sunk even lower.  There is nothing left to do but dust myself off and prepare for my next challenge.